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time to masterbate

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love...

via: Anti Joke
M: Wanna play dynamite?
W: what's that?
M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

via: Anti-Pickup Line
[on his own driving test]

- I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

via: Clarksonisms

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