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if you can read this you dont' need glasses

via: Anti Joke
Guy for a girl with a dog:
-Does the dog have a cell phone?
-Why? is your mom in heat?

via: Anti-Pickup Line
Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like?
Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

via: Clarksonisms

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