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What do you call a scottish drunk?

a taxi

via: Anti Joke
Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place?
Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

via: Anti-Pickup Line
This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to...

via: Clarksonisms

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